• July 5, 2009 at 3:21 am

    Hi,
    My parents recently moved up to NY from Florida so that I would be able to help my mom take care of my father, my father has alzheimers.

    We feel like we are hitting a road block. The problem is he is getting worse. He is fine in the day, a few moments but nothing big, but in the evening he gets restless. Trying to fix things and getting really angry when we try to redirect him to another task. I see my mom really stressed and struggling. I thought with him here I would be able to help out more, but I am a little concerned as my dad is very stubborn and frankly I am afraid he may become violent with her when she is trying to stop him from leaving the house at 12 at night. We have discussed homes, but the concern is that we can not afford it. She is waiting for her house to sell in FL and then we have money to help with the arrangements, but until then we don’t know what to do as he is getting worse.

    Does anyone have any advice. Her doctors have told her to give him these sleeping pills to calm him down, but although he goes to sleep eventually, when he wakes up he doesn’t know where he is and who my mom is. She thought we would be able to care for him at least for another year or so before having to put him in a home.

    Any advice or experience that may help is greatly appreciated, also any information about paying for homes that may help out our situation would be greatly appreciated too.

    Thank you!!

  • July 5, 2009 at 4:07 am

    btwillie is a elder lawyer that has a website about paying for Alzheimer’s care. http://www.payingforalzheimerscare.com
    I would add keep the Doctor informed of his anger issues . A medication change could help? I do not know, that is why the doctor must know about this.Do not take a beating. Call 911 before you do.Look for things to laugh about. For caregivers have allot to cry about. The trick is to make the laughter outweigh the tears.Make sure your mother gets rest breaks,eats and sleeps good and takes good care of herself as well.Being a caregiver is quite stressful. You take care of yourself,too.